So I caught Zombieland, and here's more than just my review of the film, but the review of my evening altogether:
7:10 - show up at the theatre with a Regal gift card I found at the bottom of a drawer at my house. It has $5.50 on it. The tickets have now been bumped down to 16.50 for me and my wife. Did we just get a deal or what!! (With luck this good I might get a hand job with my jacket on my lap during the movie just like in 8th grade)
7:15 - We find out that the movie is playing on a jumbo screen. We walk into a theatre that resembles the Coliseum. There's about 17 people scattered about the theatre. This is nice for two reasons. I'm going to get to sit dead middle, right where I like to be. And the chances of a HJ have just been increased.
7:30 - Previews start, usually my favorite part of going to the talkie's. This time it isn't, as for all the trailers they are all horror films that will most definitely suck. And another thing, why are they still called trailers? The haven't been shown at the end of movies, hence their original name trailer, since like the 50's. They are previews, lets just all call them what they are. The previews all sucked, the trailers didn't suck, it was the previews that wasted my time.
Oh, some one has now sat next to me. Not right next to me, but a one seat barrier. I know most people think that is protocol, but not when a 2,000 person room has 17 people in it. Find another section, you are too close to me.
7:50 - The 7:30 movie starts. The first scenes have me, and that's not easy. I'm no slut when it comes to my opinion of movies early on. From the first 5 minutes I can tell that this movie has originality, something that doesn't really happen in Hollywood these days. This must have nothing to do with some one named Michael Bay.
8:20 - The movie has now entered a series of events that have changed my life, literally. I won't give anything away, because it's just too wonderful and you need to experience it yourself. I have now learned that if you want to make a movie, there are now no rules. When some one tells you that, "you can't do that". You tell them to watch Zombieland, because, "yes you can."
9:10 - The movie is over. Two things quickly run through my mind.
1. I loved every second of that movie, and it had no point what so ever. No plot, no nothing, and it was wonderful.
2. That movie was 80 minutes long. Why can't all movies be 80 minutes long? Why are there 2 hour specials of FUCKING Gray's Anatomy every week? This movie was gold, and finished under 90 minutes. Learn something everyone.
Overall you need to see this movie. Not because it's a movie that makes you think. That will move you to serious thought about world issues. Bring you to tears, or show you amazing special effects. Because it doesn't do a single one of those, it's just fucking entertaining.
And that's why we go to the movies isn't it?
7:10 - show up at the theatre with a Regal gift card I found at the bottom of a drawer at my house. It has $5.50 on it. The tickets have now been bumped down to 16.50 for me and my wife. Did we just get a deal or what!! (With luck this good I might get a hand job with my jacket on my lap during the movie just like in 8th grade)
7:15 - We find out that the movie is playing on a jumbo screen. We walk into a theatre that resembles the Coliseum. There's about 17 people scattered about the theatre. This is nice for two reasons. I'm going to get to sit dead middle, right where I like to be. And the chances of a HJ have just been increased.
7:30 - Previews start, usually my favorite part of going to the talkie's. This time it isn't, as for all the trailers they are all horror films that will most definitely suck. And another thing, why are they still called trailers? The haven't been shown at the end of movies, hence their original name trailer, since like the 50's. They are previews, lets just all call them what they are. The previews all sucked, the trailers didn't suck, it was the previews that wasted my time.
Oh, some one has now sat next to me. Not right next to me, but a one seat barrier. I know most people think that is protocol, but not when a 2,000 person room has 17 people in it. Find another section, you are too close to me.
7:50 - The 7:30 movie starts. The first scenes have me, and that's not easy. I'm no slut when it comes to my opinion of movies early on. From the first 5 minutes I can tell that this movie has originality, something that doesn't really happen in Hollywood these days. This must have nothing to do with some one named Michael Bay.
8:20 - The movie has now entered a series of events that have changed my life, literally. I won't give anything away, because it's just too wonderful and you need to experience it yourself. I have now learned that if you want to make a movie, there are now no rules. When some one tells you that, "you can't do that". You tell them to watch Zombieland, because, "yes you can."
9:10 - The movie is over. Two things quickly run through my mind.
1. I loved every second of that movie, and it had no point what so ever. No plot, no nothing, and it was wonderful.
2. That movie was 80 minutes long. Why can't all movies be 80 minutes long? Why are there 2 hour specials of FUCKING Gray's Anatomy every week? This movie was gold, and finished under 90 minutes. Learn something everyone.
Overall you need to see this movie. Not because it's a movie that makes you think. That will move you to serious thought about world issues. Bring you to tears, or show you amazing special effects. Because it doesn't do a single one of those, it's just fucking entertaining.
And that's why we go to the movies isn't it?
