I spent the better part of a decade enrolled at THE Ohio State University, and throughout those many endless nights and football Saturdays I've encountered quite the fair share of co-eds being co-eds. So with that in mind every now and then I'm going to post a story or incident that occurred during my tenure for my own recollection and your amusement.
Year: Week 2, Freshman year
Cast: Me
Dano (my roommate, and one of, wait no, the hairiest man in North American)
Creepy Kyle (Asian fellow that loves church as well as moshing at your local death metal show)
Dano is sleeping in his bottom bunk as i sleep on the top bunk. We are taking a nap and watching News Radio re-runs (very underrated show by the way) It's a dorm so i guess we didn't close our door all the way, most likely because our neighbor uses my computer to look up porn so HIS doesn't get a virus. Well I awake to Creepy Kyle standing right up against the side of my metal bunk, staring at me. Now he's a good 7 or 8 inches from my face, just staring. With the most calm, I'm not doing anything fucking insane at all, look in his face. I proceed to say, and why wouldn't I, "What are you doing Kyle?" And he says with the tone and poise of Hannibal Lector, "Just watching you sleep buddy." Just watching you sleep buddy? Buddy? Who the hell is this guy? After he said it, he just walks out. Oh and whistling, i forgot that. When he's gone, I look down below me to Dano, and start to say, "Did you..." and he chimes right in to say, "Yeah i fucking saw that. i thought the next line out of his mouth was, "I'm going to kill your family with an axe..... buddy."
Year: Week 2, Freshman year
Cast: Me
Dano (my roommate, and one of, wait no, the hairiest man in North American)
Creepy Kyle (Asian fellow that loves church as well as moshing at your local death metal show)
Dano is sleeping in his bottom bunk as i sleep on the top bunk. We are taking a nap and watching News Radio re-runs (very underrated show by the way) It's a dorm so i guess we didn't close our door all the way, most likely because our neighbor uses my computer to look up porn so HIS doesn't get a virus. Well I awake to Creepy Kyle standing right up against the side of my metal bunk, staring at me. Now he's a good 7 or 8 inches from my face, just staring. With the most calm, I'm not doing anything fucking insane at all, look in his face. I proceed to say, and why wouldn't I, "What are you doing Kyle?" And he says with the tone and poise of Hannibal Lector, "Just watching you sleep buddy." Just watching you sleep buddy? Buddy? Who the hell is this guy? After he said it, he just walks out. Oh and whistling, i forgot that. When he's gone, I look down below me to Dano, and start to say, "Did you..." and he chimes right in to say, "Yeah i fucking saw that. i thought the next line out of his mouth was, "I'm going to kill your family with an axe..... buddy."
1 comment:
james, it is mallory. i cant wait to read mroe osu stories!
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